Question: Polly Perkins was after a talking parrot, so she went to the local pet shop in the hope of securing such a find. She was in luck. The shop assistant assured her that the parrot would learn and repeat any word or phrase it heard. Polly was delighted. However, a week later, the parrot still hadn't spoken a word. Polly returned to the shop to complain, however, it appeared that the assistant was accurate in what he had said, and refused a refund. Why didn't the parrot talk?
Answer:

The parrot was deaf and as such couldn't repeat a single word it had heard!

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Question: What two things can you never eat for breakfast?
Answer: Lunch and dinner.
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Question: What can run but never walks, has a mouth but never talks, has a head but never weeps, has a bed but never sleeps?
Answer: Water
A river.
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Question: What word can be written forward, backward or upside down, and can still be read from left to right?
Answer: NOON
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Question: They have not flesh, nor feathers, nor scales, nor bone. Yet they have fingers and thumbs of their own. What are they?
Answer: Gloves
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Question: I am large as a castle, yet lighter than air. 100 men and their horses cannot move me. What am I?
Answer: The castle's shadow.
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Question: If three cats catch three mice in three minutes, how many cats would be needed to catch 100 mice in 100 minutes?
Answer: The same three cats would do. Since these three cats are averaging one mouse per minute, given 100 minutes, the cats could catch 100 mice.
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Question: A woman was horrified to find a fly in her tea. The waiter took her cup and went into the kitchen and returned with a fresh cup of tea. She shouted, "You brought me the same tea!" How did she know?
Answer: Sugar
She had already put sugar in it and when she tasted the new tea it was already sweet.
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Question: This is as light as a feather, Yet no man can hold it for long. What is it?
Answer: Your Breath.
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Question: What is put on a table, cut, but never eaten?
Answer: A deck of cards.
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