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Riddle:
One day, down at the South Pole, five penguins and twice as many polar bears got onto a train. The train was headed to another station that was 15 minutes away from where it was initially. What is wrong with this story?
Answer: Polar bears live at the North Pole, while penguins live at the South Pole. They can't coexist at the same Pole.
Riddle:
Marge and Lucille were best of friends, but both of them were highly competitive. One day they entered a grueling 50-mile bicycle race along with a large group of other contestants. Lucille was the more experienced of the two riders, but throughout the race, Marge was always out in front of her. Not once did she allow Lucille to pass her, but Lucille's fiery, competitive spirit would not be quenched, as she never let Marge out of her sight for even one instant. Even after 50 long miles, Marge and Lucille were only separated by a couple of feet, with Marge finally passing the finish line less than one second ahead of Lucille. Neither racer won, but they both finished in the top ten of all the competitors. After the race, Lucille was asked about her competing with her friend Marge. All Lucille would say was, "I couldn't have passed her, even if I had wanted to. In fact, it was impossible." What led Lucille to make such a bizarre statement?"
Answer: Marge and Lucille had been participating in a tandem bicycle race (bicycles built for two people).
Riddle:
I sail the seas of the north with no captain to guide me and no crew to man me. I am feared by all who do not prepare themselves for my wrath. Ships have never defeated me head on. But when my time comes, I will finally be at peace and one with the sea. What am I?
Riddle:
Shirley's two-year-old granddaughter carries around with her something Shirley recently purchased for her in the produce section of a local supermarket. The little girl has the item wrapped in a blanket, pretending it is her baby. She carries her "baby" with her everywhere she goes, and even sleeps with it at nighttime. However, the "baby" has no body, but consists of a brown head with two eyes and a mouth; or is it two eyes and a nose? Sometimes it is difficult to tell, but only the face of the baby peeks out from the surrounding blanket. What type of produce is this "baby" that Shirley's granddaughter carries around with her?
Answer: The two-year-old’s “baby” is actually a coconut which she wraps in a blanket, with the three circular indentations of the “face” turned outward.
Riddle:
Mrs. Harris went to the police station to file a report. She said that someone had attacked her. Here is her story: "I was in the restaurant bathroom, fixing my makeup. Suddenly, a stranger hit me on the head! I didn't see what this person looked like because he approached me from behind!". The police officer refused to file the report and sent Mrs. Harris home. Why?
Answer: If Mrs. Harris was fixing her makeup, she was most likely looking in the mirror (after all, she wouldn't want to ruin her makeup, right?). If someone had approached the woman from behind, she would have DEFINITELY seen what he or she looked like. Therefore, Mrs. Harris lied, and made up the whole story.
Riddle:
Bruno, a former race car driver, decided to switch professions when he became 30 years old. One day, on his new job, he suddenly felt compelled to speed up his car to over 90 miles per hour on the highway. As he glanced at his rearview mirror, he saw two police cars with their lights flashing and sirens wailing, coming up behind him; but Bruno appeared unphased by this, and he increased his speed to over 100 m.p.h. The two police cars remained in hot pursuit when suddenly, Bruno heard a loud bang and realized he had blown a tire. He was very fortunate to be able to pull safely over to the side of the road. Bruno laid his head down on his steering wheel as the two police cars reached his location --- and then went whizzing past him down the highway. All Bruno could say was, "I hope they don't get away." Why didn’t the two police cars stop to arrest Bruno for speeding and running from the law, and what is Bruno's new profession?
Answer: Bruno's new profession as he had become a police officer. He was in his police cruiser when he spotted a car that matched the description of one used by a couple of men who had just committed a robbery, and he began his high-speed pursuit. Two other police cars joined in the pursuit until Bruno’s car had a flat tire.
Riddle:
Dorothy and Irene are now model citizens, but in their younger days, when they were in elementary school, they were known as "The Two Lightning Bolts". It was the last day of fourth grade for these two classmates back in 1929, and the two had concocted an evil plot to get back at their fourth-grade teacher, who they did not like. At one point, when the teacher turned his back on them to face the blackboard, Dorothy and Irene each carefully removed loaded guns from their lunch boxes, aimed them at the teacher, and pulled the triggers. Fortunately, they were both poor shots, but they did manage to graze their teacher on his back and head with a few of their repeated shots. As the teacher tried to escape the classroom, he slipped and fell twice on Dorothy and Irene’s loose ammunition, but he managed to make it to the school office to report the shooting attack. However, "The Two Lightning Bolts" received only a two-week suspension, starting at the beginning of the following school year for their premeditated attack on the teacher. I always heard discipline was better and stronger in the past, but these two tried to shoot their teacher with loaded guns, and got off with only a two-week suspension! How can this travesty ok of justice possibly be explained?
Answer: Dorothy and Irene did indeed shoot their teacher while in fourth grade, but the attack was made with their squirt guns. The teacher slipped on the water which had missed him, and he subsequently slipped and fell on the floor during his attempted escape. The school went lightly on the two, because they knew the parents had additional punishments for “The Two Lightning Bolts”.
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