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"Parrot" Riddles - 6 of 6

Riddle: A pet shop owner had a parrot with a sign on its cage that said "Parrot repeats everything it hears". Davey bought the parrot and for two weeks he spoke to it and it didn't say a word. He returned the parrot but the shopkeeper said he never lied about the parrot. How can this be?
Answer: The parrot was deaf.
Riddle: I went to the zoo today and I saw four parrots, three flamingoes, and six tigers. How many birds did I see in total?
Answer: I saw seven birds: the four parrots and the three flamingoes. Tigers are not birds, so you're not supposed to count them.
Riddle: What do you get when you cross a parrot with a centipede?
Answer: A walkie-talkie.
Riddle: What did the parrot say on the 4th of July?
Answer: "Poly wants a firecracker!"
Riddle: A robber comes in a house that a rich person owns and hears a voice Jesus is watching you. He goes in the kitchen and hears it even louder. Jeaus is watching you and keeps going room through room it getting even louder till he comes to the bedroom and sees a parrrot that is saying, "Jesus is watching you" The robber is freaked out when he hears something moving behind him. What is it?
Answer: It was Jesus, the owners Rottweiler (dog)
Riddle: A great banquet was prepared for a Roman emperor and his courtiers. 22 Dormice, 40 Larks' Tongues, 30 Flamingos and 40 Roast Parrots were served. How many portions of Boiled Ostrich were served?
Answer: 42. Each vowel is worth 2 and each consonant 4, so Dormice gives 22, ect.

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